How I Met Your Mother S01E07 – Matchmaker

Barney and Ted visit a matchmaker who tries to find Ted the perfect woman. Marshall and Lily find a strange creature in the apartment.


 
Robin does a story on a matchmaking service with a 100% track record called Love Solutions. Robin and Barney recommend Ted try out the service but he is not interested so Barney tricks Ted into going by telling him that his boat is sinking. Ellen Pierce, the woman in charge of the matchmaking service sees straight through Barney, knowing full well that he was not looking for a soul mate but was only seeking a one-night stand with a desperate woman (the alias he wrote on the registration form, "Jack Package," gave him away). On the other hand she states that she "can work with" a skeptical Ted and convinces him that she can truly help him find a soul mate in 3 days. After 5 days Ted wants to go back to Love Solutions and find out what the problem is. Everyone tells him not to "Ted out" about it (explaining that Ted's name is also a verb, which means to over-think). He returns to Love Solutions, only to find that his chances for finding a soul mate are zero. The closest match compatible with Ted has already been matched up. Ted sneaks back in and finds out she is a dermatologist and makes an appointment to see her. He learns that she is engaged and will be getting married in a few days. He tells her that if things change, he'll be available. She calls him up, and while he thinks things have changed, she merely informs him of something she spotted after his appointment. He reveals why he's been coming there, and she tells him to not believe in matchmaking services. He then returns to Love Solutions, and finds that because he has no soul mate (according to the computer), the company is ruined, as the 100% success rate no longer exists. Ted, however, has hope that he will find his soul mate and says she can help as she is now doing it for free.

Meanwhile, Marshall and Lily have spotted an unusual creature in the apartment. When they first see it, they run away, with Lily believing it to be a cockroach, while Marshall believes that it is a mouse. They spot it again, and try to kill it with bug spray and a phone book. They run away again when the phone book starts moving (meaning that the creature isn't dead), but got a good glimpse of the creature. The creature is described as having six legs, antennae, and an exoskeleton, but also has tufts of fur, whiskers, and a tail, and is roughly the size of a potato. Marshall and Lily call it the "cockamouse". Robin is skeptical of them, but eventually they catch it, and Marshall takes it to the Columbia University Biology department. When Marshall arrives, he finds the "cockamouse" has escaped, and must still be in the apartment. Robin finally sees the creature, and throws a drink at it when the only way she can think of subduing it is by trying to get it drunk. Marshall arrives and grabs it and throws it out the window and to their surprise the "cockamouse" flies away until it tries to get back in the window, which as soon as they see thing flying back at them, close the window and the "cockamouse" flies straight into it with a loud clunk.

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